The Roulette Wheel

Ok...so I've been a little quiet for the last couple weeks for a pretty decent reason. First of all I was finishing my school for the kids. Really snuck up on me actually. I was still kinda dicking around and then BAM! School's over. It was fucked up. Anyway. School's over for the third year. Third graduation attended. Third set of students to whom I've had to say goodbye. That's never fun. But the main reason I haven't been around to the blog is because summer school started a week before school ended so I've been a little more than the normal busy. This week has been weird. Hell! Last Thursday was the weirdest! It was the day after school let out and I had nothing to do. Nothing. I nearly ate my fucking arm off! I watched movies, played video games, watched some anime, went to starbucks, went to The Fillmore...fuck...I did everything I could and I was going stir-crazy. I had only been in the summer for one day...this summer was going to be rough. It's almost a week later and I dread almost every afternoon. It doesn't help that my class is LITERALLY a 4 hour lecture on algebra I level math. Makes we want to claw out my eyeballs...but as soon as it's over that's it. Nothing else to do for the day. Ugh.

I'm just getting tired of being alone I think. This happens every once in a while especially when I see movies that really hit me in the gut. This time it was a double whammy. My final film to my favorite class (had them two years and I love every one of them) was of course my favorite film of all time. Amelie. It reminds me of a lot of things. Good and bad....but the only bad things it reminds me of are actually good...they just aren't around anymore. My second whammy was the Sex and the City movie this weekend. I didn't get to share it with whom I would have liked but Amanda Hoffman was a good movie buddy and I loved the film. Just too many reminders. Anyway...I get a lot of comments on being so busy. I've heard everything. I get, "you trying to kill yourself??!!" a lot...but no...I'm just trying to stay cool, and when I have so little personal time I actually barely get 5 hours sleep a night? Yeah...there's just no time to think in there...thank god. Course...right now...little too much time to think.

I'm thinking about getting out, joining some local clubs, hooking up with some volunteer organizations...just anything to get out of the house. I'm a little tired of hanging out at bars and reading. Costs a lot of money and just doesn't really do much for me anymore. I used to think I would get out and meet people doing that but the only people I get to know are the bartenders and the waitresses and they just aren't accessible outside of the bar so what's the point?

Anyway...just lamenting a little and trying a cathartic approach (as usual because it works) to talk a little about how much I love and hate the summer. Anyway...time to watch a movie(Angel A, Botched)...or maybe hit the bar and start my next book (Snow Crash)...or play some more games(Mass Effect, GTA4, Ratchet and Clank: Size Matters). It keeps me from doing something stupid....ok...now...don't freak out! I don't mean REALLY stupid I just mean normal stupid...ya know...like involving the misuse of a phone or email.

Anyway...I'm out to do my thing. Take it easy people and give Moen a call! He's all by his lonesome in Dayton and he needs love calls! I know he reads this, so sorry if you get a bunch of calls mate...no I won't make out with you :)

Tommy "Once again, posting avoids tragedy!" Schubert