The Roulette Wheel

I have been thinking about why I cry lately. Well. Much like almost every other post, I've started in the middle of my thought and have to backtract. So here goes: I was watching the sex and the city movie the other day and I got "emotional" several times. All happy cries so not that big a deal. Happens all the time for me. Then I started thinking about the last time I cried over something sad. I'm sure you all remember. But that was a decently long while ago. I've cried a whole bunch since then...just not over anything sad. I have never really cried at a funeral (hence why I'm ALWAYS the Paul Bearer) and I just got to thinking why I cry so easily at happy things and not sad. So I dug a little deeper. What's the real difference? Is there something connecting or contrasting about the two more than the obvious? And I THINK I came up with something. Long-time readers are going to sense a theme and then remember that my chosen counseling theory is based on this: choice. When I cry, in general, it's because of someone's choice, be it happy OR sad. Someone chooses to give up an organ for a friend? Crying. Someone chooses to get on a plane and fly halfway around the world just to kiss someone else and ask them to marry them? Crying. Someone choosing to give a rousing speech about their two best friends getting hitched to each other (cough!)? Bawling! You get the idea.

I think I'm probably right here, but I suppose I could be wrong. I guess I just like to think that there are things you can't control and things you can. And you shouldn't worry about what you can't. Yes yes, I understand that given enough time and omnipotence you can choose to change any outcome, but I'm thinking a little more realistically here. My happy cries seem to come from things requiring direct human intervention, and so do my sad ones. I guess I've simply subconsciously learned the universal truth: "shit happens"

Tommy "received what some would call the holy grail last night" Schubert