The Roulette Wheel

I'm a couple of days away from pax. About to head out and kinda dreading it. That's not something I was really expecting. Though I transitioned to friend with the ex pretty well I'm just not looking forward to spending the weekend with her wide eyed and attaching herself to my hip. I'm doing really well with Lauren and I don't want anything weird to happen. I'll want to see a lot of Mike and Erin and if she's just too scared to spend anytime alone that's going to be a big problem. I REALLY like to walk around conventions alone. But anyway. I guess I should update a little.

Second date with Lauren this last weekend. It went really well as a weekend and really shitty as a date. I won't bother with details but just a simple equation should suffice.

Migraine+six member mariachi band+spicy food=shitty dinner

Coffee shop closing at 10+Texas roaches+lots of talk about ex-boyfriend=shitty coffee

Shitty coffee+shitty dinner+someone I really like=awesome second date!! :)

So yeah I hope you can follow the math. That second date lasted until 5am so I think I'm doing ok. Especially considering our third date was the next night and I saw her again Sunday before I left. Still haven't defined the relationship but at least I know where I am and know where the relationship is. It's in freefall. Ok since freefall is my own term I'll just have to explain it. Imagine being on a ramp. Maybe even on a skateboard. Staying on a skateboard is hard enough as it is, just like a relationship. Riding up that ramp is exhilirating. As you get to the top you're a little scared but you feel great. And then you're airborne. Nothing's holding you up. You aren't pressed against the board anymore, your destination is uncertain, your safety is unassured. That's where we are right now. We just had a fantastic weekend. We're a lot closer in a lot of different ways, but now we're hurtling through the air hoping to land safely. We're both about to scoot out for the weekend off to have our own fun in the same towns as our ex's. We've talked once last night for about an hour. Maybe we'll talk tonight but that's just it. Who knows? That's freefall. It's that quiet deadzone right after a great weekend or a fantastic date. So yeah. Get past this weekend. Get to the next date. Hope we both enjoy it as much as we did last weekend. Maybe? Just maybe I'll land safely on the board and not flat on my face. We'll see, but it IS fun. :)

Sorry for the long metaphor but that's how I work and that's you're update.

Oh and by the way, I'm back to contacts. They'll be pictures eventually, please let me know if I look better in glasses ;)

Tommy "Eyes. So. Blue." Schubert