The Roulette Wheel

I would love to be able to talk about this on my facebook but I don't think it's something that's going to happen without upsetting a couple people.  I guess that's why I have this place right?

Here's what happened:  Over the last week I've had this girl from the festival following me around and doing everything in her power to seek me out in a crowd.  It was a new experience.  I ended up in a lot of conversations with her and ended up learning a lot about her.  Just about everything I needed to know in order to get Matt to suggest strongly that I ask her out.  Here's the thing.  Wasn't quite ready for that in the grand scheme of grief over Melanie yet, but I did it anyway.  Keep it mind this is after hours of conversation over about a week.  Several inseparable parties and lots of people asking if I was going to ask her out.  Lots of connection.  Moderate chemistry. Anyway, I finally pull the rip-cord after getting green light after green light.  Figured it would be just a matter of asking.  Guess what?  She's dating someone. 

Please explain to me how the fuck that works.  How do people not know about the unspoken rule of subtly mentioning your significant other to people you're talking to that seem interested?  I mean, doesn't everyone know you have about 10 minutes of continuous conversation to get that information across?  I do it.  All the people I call friend do it.  I mean, if you don't it's just rude.  Right?  You KNOW you're actively flirting with someone that might actually be interested in you.  You KNOW you're leading them on.  You KNOW that in a lot of ways what you're doing is something your S.O. would probably frown on.  So why the fuck are you doing it?  To make yourself feel better?  Selfish.  Not cool.  Fucking inconsiderate.

The real kick in the pants is something we've all experienced at one point or another.  You've done all the above, they finally mention that you're interested and they just wanna be friends.  But they've asked you directly if you can actually be friends.  That's what they wanted out of this whole adventure.  They lured you in with the prospect of a relationship and they just want your ear.  This is something that Nerdy Good Guys experience all the time.  Actually more times than not. It gets discouraging, but that's not the point.  The point is that every time this happens I hear one simple phrase repeat in my head periodically for the next couple days:  "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" 

'Case you missed it, I'm the cow and my ear, humor, and personality are the milk.  I guess this is what it's like to be dumb as a brick but have big tits.

Ahhhh, much better!  Just needed to get that out.  Been bothering me.

I'll have an AFFD update in the next couple days.  It was pretty awesome but I don't want it in the same post as a rant.  It deserves better.

Tommy "STILL too nice for his own good" Schubert